Here Comes the Drama with Christa Innis

Wedding Demands, Ultimatums, and a Disney Honeymoon with Liz Fleming

• Christa Innis • Season 1 • Episode 6

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Think weddings are all love and laughter? 

In this episode, Christa spills the tea with Liz Fleming, life coach and founder of The Small Town Social, on setting boundaries and surviving wedding drama. From hosting epic events to managing moments that make you go "Did that really just happen?" Liz brings her A-game with hilarious stories and savvy advice.

The pair dives into juicy listener confessions, from overbearing in-laws to cringe-worthy pre-gaming fails at dry weddings. Liz breaks it all down with tips for staying cool, calm, and collected while keeping the good vibes rolling.

Whether you’re tying the knot, hosting a bash, or just here for the gossip, this episode will have you laughing, learning, and maybe even rethinking that bouquet toss.

Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments

  • Discussion on the importance of setting boundaries in weddings and events.
  • Juicy listener stories about overbearing in-laws and dry wedding dilemmas.
  • Wedding speech disasters and how to handle unplanned drama.
  • Liz’s advice on creating meaningful, joyful events while maintaining personal boundaries.
  • Insights into the cultural expectations of big weddings versus intimate gatherings.
  • Hot takes on viral wedding trends and why authenticity matters.

Mentioned in the Episode

About Liz

Liz Fleming is a multi-passionate entrepreneur, life coach, and founder of The Small Town Social, a personal development community focused on empowering women. With 20 years as an award-winning PR professional, Liz pivoted her career to help ambitious women step into their power and live joyfully. 

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Christa Innis: Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of here comes the drama, the podcast that dives into the chaos and hilarity and unforgettable moments of weddings and events. I'm your host, Krista Ennis from Party Planning by Krista. And today's episode is packed with more juicy stories and hot takes that you won't want to miss.

I am so excited for today's episode because I have my friend here, Liz Fleming. Liz and I actually worked together at my. Most recent job probably about a year ago now, by the time this episode comes out, probably about closer to a year. She at the time was our PR girl, at the job I was working. And since then, she's made quite the pivot and is now, An amazing life coach.

So a little bit about Liz. She is a two time business owner, mom, military spouse, and author. And her newest endeavor, which she is so naturally great at is a quantum life coach. She's so passionate about helping women step into their power and purpose. And as the founder of the small town social, she's also the host.

Of life with Liz podcast. She shares bold conversations, mindset hacks, and inspiring advice to help you grow and thrive. she is just such a kind and amazing person. And I thought she was perfect for the podcast because she talks. So often about having boundaries and following your purpose and following your goals.

And with all these crazy stories that I share on, party planning by Krista, we know that boundaries are so important. So I thought it was cool to hear from. Someone that has some life coaching experience and works with women and empowering and lifting them up all the time. So, she has some amazing hot takes and amazing advice for women listening.

And, I could go on and on about how great Liz is. So without further ado, here is my episode with Liz Fleming. Enjoy.

Hi, Liz. Thank you so much for coming on. 

Liz Fleming: Hey, Christa. It's so nice to see you. Yeah, I know. I feel like, I know we were just talking before recording, but I'm like, I feel like time has gone so fast and also feels like the blink of an eye. It's time is so weird now. Yeah. Time's weird, but we just move on.

We move through. 

Christa Innis: We do. We do. It just flies by. I'm so excited to have you on. Like I said, I thought of you right away because you are the host of your own podcast. You host events. You are so multifaceted. And so I thought you would be the perfect person to have on here and share your own hot takes.

And we're going to play some games as we kind of go through. but first and foremost, can you kind of just share a little bit about yourself and what you do? Sure. 

Liz Fleming: Sure. Yeah, of course. I'm so excited to be here. This is going to be so much fun. It's been a while since I've done a podcast interview, so I'm getting my juices flowing again.

and the reason for that is because I have been in the thick of a total career pivot. So as you know, Krista, because we used to do a lot of fun projects together, I was a publicist for 13 years. And I was presented with an opportunity to kind of Slow down in my career and I saw that as an opportunity to totally pivot and become a life and success coach.

So right now I, yeah, it's just been amazing. You know, when you get that full body feeling that you're like doing what you're supposed to do. So I help women. Realize their purpose on purpose and realize their worth. And we can cover things from, career, life, relationships, love, finances, whatever.

But the core of what I teach is really just helping women come back to wholeness so they can live more joyfully. And I have, a set formula and a way that I do that. But. Yeah, I've been in the thick of getting my certifications. So I'm, coming out on the other side of that and I'm just hitting the ground running.

It's just been amazing. I 

Christa Innis: love that. I love that because I feel like what you said about when you find that like purpose, that thing that like really excites you, that is just like, cause it doesn't feel like work. It just feels like, Oh, I get another day of doing this exciting thing and helping people and like having a full like impact, which is amazing.

Liz Fleming: Yeah, yeah, totally. And I,forgot to mention too, like the small town social, which you're very familiar with, which is my women's personal development group that kind of inspired the whole pivot to coaching because I host an annual gathering for women to like focus on their self healing. And it just felt like coaching was like my natural next step.

So I have a lot of experience and event facilitation, which is going to make our conversation here really fun today. Yes. Yeah. It's been awesome though. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. Well, and as you're talking too about what you do and your, like, how you kind of pivoted that is perfect too because, and all these kind of skits and stories that I share on my channel, it's all about setting boundaries because so many times these women have to deal with.

Very difficult relationships or hard situations where growing up, it was, they were taught, just be a people pleaser, just say yes, or just do what they tell you. And as we get older and we say no to things, we're either told we're difficult or we're the B word, you know, things like that, where it's like, we feel bad for setting up for ourselves.

So part of like sharing these skits is like. You can do things respectfully. You can say no respectfully. So I feel like this is, you're the perfect match to be talking on this podcast because you can share your, take when it comes to setting boundaries and, Following your path of like, okay, that doesn't serve me anymore.

So let's go this way. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. And that's so spot on. And it's so funny you mentioned that because I just did a whole podcast episode about setting healthy boundaries, like specifically around the holiday season, but they really apply to life in general. And especially when, your. Hosting an event, whether you're a bride or you're hosting a birthday party or someone like me who hosts like large scale events.

Boundaries are so crucial and they really help not only set the tone for your gatherings, but just set you apart and set the tone Make everyone or, allow everyone to have fun, including yourself. So totally so important. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. I love that. So with that being said, let's jump into my first segment here, which is any crazy stories or, and then we're going to get into wedding hot takes.

So right off the bat, I know we were kind of talking and you said, just like leading events, you kind of have different, you've seen different things, or you've seen it all just being at different things. So. Do you have any like crazy stories that come off mind or anything you've like, heard that you were kind of like, kind of shocking or like, oh my 

Liz Fleming: goodness.

 what's sticking out for me as an event host is I, love to involve my audience in my gatherings as much as possible, I don't like to stand on a stage all day and like talk at the audience. I've done that before and it was, you know, it works for everyone. They learned a lot, but it was just like, so over the last 6 and a half years of doing these events, with the small town social, I have really involved my audience, but.

You have to be cautious with that. So things like passing around the microphone and doing group shares and this you guys can totally apply to like wedding speeches and stuff to be so cautious. About doing things like that. Like, have a plan. Don't just, like, go free for all and start doing the group share or letting someone have the mic and do a speech because it can really get away from you.

So, there's not really one instance. I mean, it's happened loads of times for me, which is terrifying. Someone is, like, either too scared to talk or, the microphone's pressed into their face and there's not much you can do about it. Or, They are nervous to start talking and then they talk and then they don't stop talking.

And that's a really big one where you're just kind of like, you need a game plan for that. So I have kind of a seasoned approach now, but for anyone who's interested in hosting events, or you have an event on the horizon, that's like my number one thing is just totally involve your audience so they have fun, but.

Proceed with caution. 

Christa Innis: Yes. Oh my God. I'm so glad you said that because that was something I shared. How do you remember where I shared it now? It might've been in a story somewhere, but I was at a wedding once I was a bridesmaid and last minute, I want to say it was like a few weeks before the wedding, she like brought on another bridesmaid, they had like a falling out and then became friends again.

And the girl right off the bat was like. Alright, I'm giving a speech didn't like wait to be asked just told her I'm gonna give a speech and this bride was like so nice and she was just like Oh Okay, just accepted it and after this bridesmaid made her speech She goes anyone else have anything to say which I was just like, No.

Lines started forming of like, siblings of the bride and groom, cousins, like, we were sitting there for probably 30 45 minutes just listening to these unplanned speeches, and they were like, not, you know, like, there's certain things you say and don't say in a speech, and they were just saying everything.

They were talking about like, sibling fights growing up, they were talking about how they had a terrible falling out growing up, and why they did, and it was just like, Is this really? happening That was so 

bad. 

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. that's like my nightmare. I know. It's like Actually, that is giving me flashbacks to my wedding because, yeah, like, more people made speeches than we knew.

it was just kind of like, okay, all right. you, it's a, it's a boundary. Yeah. Between like Respecting people, but also like, I paid for this shit, like, this is my day, kind of thing, to get into the wedding, category, but for sure, it's definitely scary, but as long as you have a plan, like, With how I run my events, I have outs, like, I have certain phrases that I say, and I'm very well versed in, how I present my body language, you know, in terms of, there are ways you can do that to, like, change a conversation and change a vibe, like, you send the signal, right, the bat signal.

Yes. I have an amazing team helping me for these events who are also well versed in that. So it makes it a lot easier to just kind of be like, okay, we're going to just take a pause here. But the other, yeah, the other reason why that's scary is probably the most obvious, like, we live in a very sensitive time right now where everyone has different opinions, views, thoughts on everything, and you just never know what someone's gonna say, so I'm not trying to answer that.

So. Scare everyone away from the group share because it is so powerful. Keep doing them. Just have an anchor, just keep people focused. Even, I mean, seriously, for any event, you can do this. So for weddings, keep it positive. Keep it light. Focus on one thing, one memory. Don't go down the rabbit hole of the things.

And the same goes for, more of a life business related event like what I do. So. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. and I want to get to hot topics in just a second. But what you just said to reminded me of this thing I saw when you said, there's so many things going on. Like, we're very opinionated, right?

I saw this, tick tock where someone was sharing. And again, I don't know what things I should say or not say yet, but where in the father, the bride speech, he talked about the election. he was so happy and came out wearing a hat and I was just like, no, no, no. And I guess she knew she had feelings that he was going to do this and was like, do not do it.

So she had already told him, do not do it. And he still did it and he made this about the election and not about her wedding, which I was like, come on, like, Oh my gosh. 

Liz Fleming: So that hurts. That hurts. It hurts a lot. 

Christa Innis: Oh yeah. So that being said, let's jump into some wedding hot takes. So I'm going to ask you a couple of questions here that are labeled as some kind of hot takes and tell me what you think.

okay. Let's see. What is one wedding trend that you think needs to be retired for good and why? 

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh.

I think, oh, am I going to get canceled for saying this? I think it's like the elaborate aisle stuff, Like, can we just get down the aisle? Like, does it have to be like an elaborate dance thing or like, you know? 

Christa Innis: choreography dance or something? 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, and maybe those are already over, I haven't seen them in a while, but I just remember there was a time when they were like, the thing, and, I don't know, how long have I been married?

Seven years? Six years? Five years? I remember when I was planning my wedding, I was like, that's not happening. so, I feel like it's, kind of that, but maybe it's more of like the, Just extreme displays of, entertainment to, like, go viral. Because everyone's recording people at the wedding, and I just miss when it was intimate and, like, personal.

And now it's just, like, a fucking entertainment reality show sometimes, and I think that's what needs to go. That's what I'm trying to get at. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. No, I totally see what you mean, because I think we're losing sight of what makes sense for our relationship, and our Wishes instead of going viral. You totally hit the nail on the head with that because, I was just talking to someone about how we are so caught up in what everyone else wants for our wedding day already, that we lose sight of like, Wait, that doesn't make sense for me.

Like I would never do that. Or, like when parents come in, they like, they want to invite 500 people. It's like, well, I'm very introverted. So that's like really uncomfortable for me the same way. It's like, Oh, let's do this viral dance. So that maybe we have a chance of like blowing up on Tik TOK.

why, why do you ask yourself? Why do you want that? 

Liz Fleming: Yes, exactly. It's like the gender reveals they've gone too far. It's like, yes. We're 

Christa Innis: starting forest fires in California. Like let's, not do that, people. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. 

Christa Innis: We can just, you know, do the old fashioned way, eat into a cupcake or something, if you really just have the baby and then just 

Liz Fleming: have the baby.

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Okay. That was a good one. Do you think big weddings are worth the expense or would you recommend keeping it small and intimate? 

Liz Fleming: That's totally subjective. I don't want to crush the girl's dreams. That's like, or the guy's dreams. That's just like. I want to have a huge wedding.

I personally feel that if, your wedding day is going to put such a financial strain on you that you're going to enter your marriage with such a level of stress that's not going to make it fun, then that's not worth it. I'm personally an advocate for like, small and intimate and just let it be messy and, you know.

so, I think it's really like, it's up to you, obviously, and your budget. Weddings have gotten so expensive. So, I know people who have gone and done, like, a lot of the destination weddings for that reason. They're like, well, if we're gonna spend big money, we're just gonna like, Go overseas and do it, but then it's smaller and more intimate because less family can go.

So it's kind of like this also hybrid segment now of weddings, which I love. I'm like, that sounds like fun. Maybe for our 10 year anniversary, like we can do something awesome like that. But yeah, I'm all for like the small and intimate at the end of it. Yeah. 

Christa Innis: I think you make a really good point and it kind of goes back into people trying to impress others and not staying true to like themselves.

if it's. In your budget or if that was always your dream to have a big wedding, have that big wedding, do it, go all out, get all the craziness and Do it. I think that's amazing. Cause I get so like frustrated when I see comments that are like, Oh, weddings are so dumb. Like they could have used that for a house.

And it's like, well, maybe their goal wasn't to get a house right away. Maybe their goal was a big wedding. But yeah, if you're going to be in 50, 000 of debt because you can't afford the wedding, then maybe you should rethink it. yeah, there's definitely so many signs. 

Liz Fleming: You also have to consider like cultural perspectives, right?

In some cultures, big weddings are the norm and there's no other way. Like that's what you do and vice versa. So I think it's really important to look at it from all of those angles as a society. And then also, From the angle of like, not everyone has a big family, and so they're compensating by inviting all of the friends that they maybe met later in life, and for them, that big wedding is worth it to bring all of those people that they care about and who support them together, who they may not have had in their lives.

For a long time before that so there's so many different variables that go into the why for someone's size of their wedding and I'd love to see more people just be respectful about it like you said like that comment, maybe they already had a house or maybe they don't want a house or maybe they're going to travel the world.

You just never know someone's story or their why. And I just, I love just seeing how creative couples are getting now with how they celebrate their love. And. At the end of the day, that's the name of the game. that's what it is. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. A hundred percent. And I always find people that kind of tune out the noise when they're planning and do what is.

In their hearts of like, what is true for them. Those are the people that are most satisfied at their wedding. I feel like so many people that like, listen to the noise, and do what other people tell them to do, are like, I wish I could have a redo. I wish I could do that differently. I hated that it was so big, or I hated that it was so small, because they listen to everybody but themselves.

So. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. 

Christa Innis: Okay. Boundaries. Yes. Boundaries is the name of the game. All right. Next segment is called pick a side wedding drama debates. So I started asking social media, to send me their unpopular opinions. So I'm going to read a few of them and we can kind of debate what they say.

Okay. This first one says, I don't like the idea of a first look. Husband had to wait to see me until I came down the aisle.  

Liz Fleming: Well, I am all about shock and awe, so I don't love the first look thing. It's really like, I don't know, it feels like it kind of defeats the purpose. I get it, it's nice to have that one on one moment. But to have that moment together, Like, in front of everyone you care about, it sends out an energy that cannot be replicated.

It's like, next level good vibes, and I feel like the world needs more of that, so I'm in the camp of like, no first look. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, if I had to pick one, I would say no first look, too. We didn't do a first look, because I was like, I always pictured that like, first walk down the aisle. It just seemed more like, 

 Climatic for me. but I get, people that have done, I've been a part of weddings where they did it because of like timing purposes, like scheduling or like they were really like shy and so they were like, let me get this out of the way, you know, but yeah. okay. This next one says, I hate the bouquet toss after 25.

Nobody wants to be fighting for a bouquet. I love that. Oops. Okay. 

Liz Fleming: Oh, I don't know. 25. 25. Holy crap. So young. I love the bouquet toss. I think it's a great way to gamify your day. Like, at that point, you're more than halfway through the day. Your people have eaten, your guests have eaten, and it's like, the dancing is kind of starting to happen.

 people are like, ready to be awake again. I don't know, I had an after food wedding. And I'm like, it's just fun, and it's fast. I don't know, I think it just, it's quirky, it doesn't take up a lot of time. Do it. 

Christa Innis: Did you have anyone, push people out of the way, like, elbow, or, you might, maybe you didn't see it as the bride, I don't know.

Liz Fleming: No, not like, aggressively, it was just kind of jokey, everyone was a little tipsy, and I've been pushed out of the way. Oofy, yeah, it's been like a mosh pit for me at some weddings that I've attended, but at my wedding it's been It was tasteful. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. Some people get really, really into it.

Like very competitive. I was like scratched once and I was also in the time where it was my husband and I weren't even, we might be again been together a couple of years. There was two weddings in a row where I caught the bouquet, not on purpose. Like literally one time it fell at my feet and I was just like, Oh, and then the second time I literally just stood there and like went right to my hands.

But. That was like, we were only dating for like a year, something at that point. But, there's been some very aggressive weddings where people like push out of the way. And I was scratched and I was like, this is so intense guys. It doesn't mean you're actually gonna get married next. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. And I think too, like, you know, your people best, like.

You know your audience. I think that's something you can pull out of the bag, like, as you see fit, Like, know that your guests are gonna be just, really drunk and, belligerent and just kind of get wonky and crazy, like, maybe it's not, something that you want to do that day.

Yeah. Maybe it's something you do, like, during the bachelorette party or something, you know? Yeah. little game. There's certainly ways to modify those age old traditions, but I really love that one. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. And if you're not athletic like myself, you maybe don't do it either. Yeah. Yeah. Just kidding. I think that was part of my fear too.

I was like, I'm going to throw in, like, knock someone out and I'll feel terrible. Yeah. 

Liz Fleming: Also, if you don't do it, you save. So, I'm bet you're saving a chunk of change on that extra bouquet. They made a junk bouquet toss. That is true. That is very true. A hundred bucks saved right there. 

Christa Innis: okay. This last one says pre gaming a dry wedding is disrespectful to the bride and groom.

Liz Fleming: Yes. I think that's super rude because I mean, there really is no, because it's like, guys, really are we. 17. I don't know. if your bride and your groom have gone out of the way to make that decision consciously, it must be for a really important reason. So, respect it. And then go drink afterwards.

You know, it's their day, it's not yours. So, I say grow up and show up for your people. 

Christa Innis:  yeah, I've personally have never been to a dry wedding that I can think of, but if it was made known to me that it was a dry wedding because of one reason or another, I feel like it would be very odd to be like, let's get drinks first.

Like, yeah, 

Liz Fleming: yeah. You want to pregame this? It's so weird. Yeah, let's do 

Christa Innis: some shots in the parking lot. Like, I want to be buzzed when no one else is drinking? That just seems weird to me. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. Yeah, it's weird. I also, on the flip side, think it's really weird when people just get blackout drunk at weddings.

 I don't know. Maybe when you're in your 20s and you just don't. Really know your limits and whatever. Life is different. You don't have as many responsibilities. Like, I've been there, I've been really drunk at weddings. Hell yes, I love my people, but it's just kind of like, the pictures are ruined, the vibe is kind of a killer because then someone's gotta take care of those people and like, it's a safety issue.

don't know. So even for non dry weddings, I'm just of the mind, like, let's just know our limits and remember that we're parents. And it's okay, it's great to have a good time, but alcohol is not the cornerstone of why we're here. And I coach people on this a lot, too, like, if you're using a substance as that much of a crutch, then you need to go deeper.

There's something deeper going on there that needs to be unpacked. So, I really, I don't know, when it comes to the alcohol, that's like one of my hard boundaries, especially, as an event host for my, for what I do, I host monthly socials and they're always at kind of different watering holes around town.

So, like, wine bars and breweries, because that's just the relationships that I've developed, but there's ways to go about that tastefully and granted these events are just for women. So it's, Older women, we again, we're coming into it tastefully and respectfully, but I really think, the alcohol, you need to draw a line somewhere.

And if you have people in your corner who, you know, are going to kind of. Tip the scale when it comes to alcohol on the big day. That's a conversation that needs to be had in advance of your wedding. So it's totally yeah. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. I see stories like that all the time sent to me about like an extremely drunk or blacked out uncle or groomsmen bridesmaid where like they can't.

Walked down the aisle even. So we're talking like heavily pre gaming before the wedding even starts. And that's just like, at least wait till the after party. Okay. But like, you know, stumble home from the bar, whatever, but at least like wait until if you know, you can't handle someone just told me a story where someone was so drunk before.

 giving their speech, where their speech they were slurring, and they couldn't finish it, and then they were saying inappropriate things, and that's just like, if you know you're giving a speech, you know you're walking down the aisle, you have something you're responsible for, let's hold off a little bit.

Yeah, have a couple drinks if you can handle it. But, if you know you can't handle it, let's just, wait.

Liz Fleming: Yeah, let's just not. Yeah, and I, totally agree, that was like a hard, one of the hardest lines in the sand for me and my husband for our wedding day was, no pre gaming before I think I had a glass of champagne and he might have taken it like a shot of Jameson or had a beer or something like it was just something to shake those nerves because it's a lot of pressure and, both of us are used to being like in the spotlight around people, but.

There's something about that day that was just different for obvious reasons, like it's a huge moment. So I think things like that, they're not necessarily considered a pregame, but again, it's like a nice A little touch, a nice little addition, as long as it serves you and your guests and it's not going to like take away from everything that you've invested in, the people that have planned to be there, all of that.

So. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. To be honest, I thought I would have, this sounds really bad, I thought I would have drank more. The morning of, I don't even think I finished my glass of champagne because I was running around so much. Like someone made me a mimosa that morning and not like drink more. Like I was gonna have tons of drinks, not to make it sound like that, but like we had like a mimosa bar and like breakfast and I was like, Oh yeah.

I'll for sure. I'll have like a glass, maybe two, but probably not. Cause like sometimes champagne just hits you differently. I don't even think I finished my glass of champagne. I kept losing it because I was like running around, checking on stuff, getting hair and makeup. You kind of just forget.

And then the guys, you know, have like a slow morning. They don't have to just put a suit on pretty much. But yeah, 

Liz Fleming: I know just 

Christa Innis: shower 

Liz Fleming: and brush her hair. Yeah, same for me. I was just reflecting on my wedding, like, I wasn't even drunk, like, I just, for that reason, there was no time. And, can I share, like, my biggest regret from my wedding?

Yes, please do. My biggest and only regret from my wedding is putting the bride and groom table near the buffet entrance. Like, why did we do that? Oh, wait, 

Christa Innis: so, okay, so where your food table was, you guys also sat? 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, it was, but it was, like, spaced out enough that I thought it would be fine. So, we were in, like, a ginormous barn, and it was very elegant, and we had this beautiful, long, kind of buffet style line of food, and then our table was, like, on the edge of the dance floor, and there was probably, a 10 foot gap between where people went to get the food and our table and I think in my head I was like in this way We'll a will be able to eat b We'll get to see more people without having to go around the room so much.

It was a giant room And because we had tried to do that and we only made it to four tables, people just like talk and talk and talk and talk, and you only have so much time. But then when we sit down to try and eat, it's just like one person after another, like, congratulations, we love you guys. And it's like, I think I took one bite of food.

I mean, and that's a big expense, and we're so hungry, and so thirsty, and it was just like, our cheeks hurt, our hands hurt, so that was like my one biggest regret, is like, not being more mindful of. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. Our 

Liz Fleming: apartment and where we sat. 

Christa Innis: That's a lovely day. Yeah. That's a really smart thing to say because I've actually never heard someone say that before but it's true.

Like you get very brought into all these conversations and cause I know like my husband actually had to stop me because I was like wanting to go up to everyone cause I'm that person where I feel guilty. I'll be like, Oh my gosh, I didn't say bye to so and so even though I said hi to them earlier. And he's like, It's okay.

There's like 150 people here. If you don't say hi to one person, it's going to be okay. Yeah, no, like it was like, you're busy and I was like, okay, but yeah, we did this thing called, the mission impossible, which was really cool where it was our photographer's idea. They play that mission impossible music.

And then the DJ announces that we're going to go to each table and take a picture with each table. So that allows people to feel like they like saw you. And then they quickly move, too. So, like, one side of the table gets behind the other side, so we could easily just, like, get in there. And then it makes everyone feel like they kind of, like, hung out with the bride and groom for a little bit.

Liz Fleming: Oh, I wish we did that. I feel like there was more than half of the people that I didn't even get to talk to. Like, it was, we had about 152, and it was just, like, I really truly thought, I mean, we tried, we tried to. get around to everyone and I would have loved to have talked to everyone. some people I hadn't seen in years or ever met before, but you can only do so much.

Yeah. 

Christa Innis: It's 

Liz Fleming: so hard. It's so hard, but everyone has a great time. And I think as long as you're having a great time on your day and your guests are also benefiting from that, like you've won, you've won the lottery in terms of the wedding day. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, absolutely. All right. Let's jump into this week's story submission.

as a reminder to everyone listening, I get regular stories sent to me all the time. I probably have like 300 that I haven't even touched the surface on. So, this is a random story that I've not read yet. and so we're just going to react together. And if you guys, if you're listening, you're like, I have a story to submit.

You can submit at the show notes. There's a link there. cause they're always taking new submissions. all right. When me and my husband got engaged, we were so excited. We were dating for a long time, so we didn't want to wait too long to get married. We engaged on May 1st. And we were talking about getting married around the end or middle of June.

Oh wow, that's a very, very fascinating. Okay, so then my husband could go to some family events with me as a couple in the beginning of July. We sat down with my then fiance's parents and they were asking about If we picked a day for the wedding or not, 

I told them we were thinking June 22nd. They said that's only a month and a half away. We want to have a lot of time to get everything done. I told them I knew where I was going to get my dress and I've known in the past from other family members, getting a dress, would be no problem. as long as I was going to rent it.

I was also going to have fake flowers, and I'm doing bouquets and boutonnieres by myself, so we don't need to ask a florist in advance to do them. So it sounds like she thought things through. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. 

Christa Innis: Okay. We are also not going to have our reception at an event center. We are just planning on using a church to have a reception in.

So we don't need to look for venues that are open then. My father in law said, that isn't enough time to do other things that need to be planned. And if we do it July 22nd, then your fiancé, she put the name, but I don't want to say it, your fiancé's older sister, And her family who live in Ohio might not be able to attend since her husband's in the military, and it would be hard for her to leave and come to the wedding.

my fiance and I already had the conversation about possible people who wouldn't be able to attend the wedding. And we came to the conclusion that it was our wedding. And if people couldn't make it, then I guess they couldn't come. My fiance said, dad, we will just give people the date now so they can make arrangements.

My father-in-law said that's not how it works. You need to have everyone in from the immediate family be there for the wedding. So why don't we do July 19th? Then your sister and her husband and family can come to the wedding since they will already be there. because they're going to Disneyland that week.

There's a lot going on here. Oh my God. There's a lot of buildup here. Poor bride. I know. Just getting ripped right from her. She knows what she wants. Leave her alone. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Oh, here we go. Okay, this is where Okay. Uh 

Liz Fleming: oh. That way Oh, we're not even there yet? Oh my heavens. Okay. Yeah, it's 

Christa Innis: going.

That way, you guys can have half of your honeymoon at Disneyland. With all of us. Which we would pay for. Wouldn't that be fun? My then fiancé said Dad, we don't really want to wait that long to get married since we've been already dating so long, and we don't really want to spend half of our honeymoon with you guys since it's supposed to be just us.

Yeah. My future father in law said, Oh, well, you'll be in your own hotel room. You won't be in the Airbnb with us in California, which I will pay for. You will also have a couple of days to yourself before the Disneyland trip. So you could go to St. George for a couple of days since it's on the way to California.

Liz Fleming: Oh my gosh. We should pause 

Christa Innis: there. Wow. Helicopter munch. Geez. Yeah. Like, sure. Yeah, that's a quick engagement, but it sounds like she's already got, they've already talked it through, got it figured out. There's no need to come in and be like, well, let's do it this day. And then you can be on your honeymoon with us.

Liz Fleming: Yes. That's tricky. So I'm seeing it from both angles here. Like the bride and groom know exactly what they want, signed, sealed, delivered. Awesome. Awesome. most parents would be supportive of that. However, I get where the parents are coming from because it's such a milestone, right? It's like, they probably had this grand vision as parents over the last 20 or 30 years of how their child's wedding would go and how they would contribute and they probably felt like totally Like, left out.

I think, in most weddings, like, the parents are pretty involved, and they love to, pay for certain things, so it sounds like there was just a massive disconnect in that family, chemistry when it came to the wedding, the honeymoon thing is, okay, that's creepy, like, weird, very, well, 

Christa Innis: 

well, and I feel like the weird part of it too is because totally get you where it's like, yeah, like you visualize this day of like, you want to be able to help your kid, but it almost sounds like they are catering to the daughter and husband a little bit more and being like, well, they have a trip planned at Disneyland, so we should get married right before that.

Christa Innis: And, it sounds like they want to just have them compile this, like, vacation that the sister and husband already have planned to make it almost easier and more convenient for them. Yeah. That's the vibe I'm getting, but 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. 

Christa Innis: It's kind of weird. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. It's like they're trying to make sure that the sister, like the whole family can be together, but as a military spouse, it doesn't matter if you give a monthly time or 10 months lead time, like the military is the military and they can, likely not able to attend anyway.

Like they just get called up for something. So that was a little weird to me, but yeah, it's like, I felt overall, it was pretty disrespectful to react that way, you know, as. Someone related so closely to the bride and groom. That's just like, it's okay to have your opinions.

Privately and maybe have that discussion, but to just kind of insert yourself so directly into that moment and just kind of it just felt like she was being shut down at every turn. The poor thing. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. And I hope that there's more like, 

Christa Innis: oh, there's more. There's there's more. Can we do it? I do.

Yeah, I know. I know we're getting towards the end. If you're good, I'm good to keep going for a little bit more. You let me know when I'm good. Let's do it. Okay. My fiance said, what if we do it the 27th of June? That's a weekend. my sister still might be able to come since it's a weekend. And then we have two months for whatever other planning we need to do.

Future father in law said, No, your sister will not be able to come down that weekend either. Ohio is a long way and it costs a lot of money for her to come down to Utah. July 19th will be best for all of us. So again, saying no, my fiance then looked at me and said, 

 We will need to talk about this more than just for a second. We left the room. I talked about it, what we would want to do. I said, I'm really frustrated. I understand if she can't come, but they are making assumptions that she won't be able to make it to our wedding. So they're kind of speaking for the sister at this point.

They're not even like allowing her to answer for herself. If she really wants to come, I think she can make it happen. If she doesn't want to come, then she can't. This is supposed to be our wedding day, not your parents. I want to get married in June. I also like, and this is not to come down on the bride and groom, but I'm also like, why does it have to be June?

Like, you know, like it's like, I feel like June is such a popular month. I seen these stories where they're like June or nothing. Yeah. So that's interesting to me. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, there's so much that's not said in this story. Like, you don't know the backstory of the bride and groom and why they selected that date.

Maybe they were up against a certain timeline with certain financial things or like career stuff. You just don't know. Or health stuff. You just, you don't know. But I agree. It's like, yeah, I don't know. my family and I are very honest with each other. If, Anyone ever said that to us? I would have just been like, no.

Like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Like, are you high? I don't understand. I value your opinion, but also like, this is what we decided, so get over it. I don't know. Yeah. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, exactly. Like, I don't get, it's almost sounds like a weird control thing because it's like they're so set in June, but the dad keeps saying no, July.

And I'm like, what's the big difference between June and July? To me, nothing. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, nothing. less than a month. Also, when he said the thing about that I'm paying for, that was definitely a power play. Yes. For who's in charge here. It's like, sit down. Just, 

Christa Innis: I hate that totally. It's like hanging over the head.

Like I'm gonna pay for it. So you're gonna do what I want. 

Liz Fleming: Oh, that's so I think that's a 

Christa Innis: common Do we know if they so, um,they're talking about it. She said, I don't want to cause drama in your family. And I feel like if we push it for the 27th, it will just make things complicated with your parents.

I guess we will have to the 19th and just not make your parents go into a frenzy. My fiance said, are you sure that's what you want to do? I said, it's not what I want to do, but I guess it's what we have to do to to keep the peace. No, we went back in the room and said, I suppose we'll do July 19th. I have other stories with my wedding, but it's already so long message me if you have any questions.

Liz Fleming: Oh 

Christa Innis: my 

Liz Fleming: gosh, it makes 

Christa Innis: me so sad. You know, because again, if it was 

Liz Fleming: a little bit, 

Christa Innis: yeah, almost like if it was something like they're like, Oh, let's wait a few months so we can plan a really nice wedding for you. Or like, let's do this. It's literally a difference of a few weeks.

So I'm like, this just seems like a control thing to make it easier for the sister. They haven't even talked to the sister yet to see if she can make it or not. So I don't know. 

Liz Fleming: What kills me about this is the bride was a baller about this. I mean, she was very clear about what she wanted. She set her boundary with what she didn't want.

And she had the courage to say, That's not what I want. And she's just put in a really tricky position. I mean, imagine if you were in her shoes and that was what you were up against. That mounting pressure of, like, your in laws down your throat and, like, starting off your marriage with, like, that dark energy.

Christa Innis: Oh, yikes. so I get why she felt the pressure to change her mind, but it just sucks that she had to. Yeah, I hate that. all right. I think I did okay with reading that. I have to be honest. one time I read a confession on Facebook and someone not so nicely commented, like, before you post anything, you should make sure you know how to read.

People are so nice. And so in the back of my mind now, whenever I read, I'm like, oh my god, I'm stuttering. Oh, and then it like makes me actually worse, but I'll get it back. I'm learning how to read, guys. I'm only 34. 

Liz Fleming: And you know what? It was a really long read, so way to crush it. And I should 

Christa Innis: have probably broken it up a little bit.

Liz Fleming: No, I think it was great. I like that you read it in chunks so that we could like talk about it along the way. 

Christa Innis: Yeah, I'm learning as I go here. Okay. I don't know. We're like over time. So I'm going to make this next section a little bit shorter. It's called weekly confessions game. So I'll just do one confession and we'll rate it.

Okay. So these people are sending me their confessions on Instagram now and, rate it from one to be mild tea and tend to be absolute chaos. And if you have like something to add, feel free. Okay, this is crazy. my dad was my landlord and told me to use rent as my wedding gift, then made me pay it back the next month.

Liz Fleming: People are so weird. What the fuck? I guess. I don't, like, what? Why are you paying it back? That's not a gift. That's a loan. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. That's literally a loan. 

Liz Fleming: An 

Christa Innis: interest free loan. Yeah. 

Liz Fleming: Positioned as a gift. People are so strange. 

Christa Innis: Yeah. Okay. I'm just gonna read this Other one will really quick and we'll close out.

Yes. In laws insisted on staying at the hotel and then arrived one minute before the entrance of the bridal party. That's making a statement. 

Liz Fleming: Yeah. That's making a statement. Yeah. That was done on purpose. 

Christa Innis: Oh my gosh. Okay. This is crazy. Thank you so much for coming on Liz. I know. I'm like, what other stories can we read?

this was so fun. I really enjoyed having you come on and like catching up. can you tell us again where everyone can follow you? What other projects you're working on and all that good stuff? 

Liz Fleming: Yeah, of course. Everyone can find me on Insta. That's my favorite. So, you can find me at thesmalltownsocial on Instagram or at MsLizFleming.

I have two. And then, Yeah, all the links are there. I share a ton of content. you can work with me one on one in coaching. I think the biggest thing that I have coming up, if you are, well, even if you're not local to North Carolina, where I am, I'm hosting a women's personal development gathering called GlowCon on March 20th, 2025.

And the majority of women are here in North Carolina, but I have Some women who are actually flying in and traveling for this event from as far as like, Ohio, California, Washington, Virginia, Vermont, so it's really grown. This is the second time I'm doing it, but it's just such a beautiful day of community connection and getting to know yourself better and just have some fun on the first day of spring.

So. A lot of stuff going on for me, little ol me, but I would love to connect with you all, and this has been wonderful, Krista, thank you. Of 

Christa Innis: course! Yay, I'm so excited, this is awesome.

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